Saturday, December 1, 2012

Please tell me dreams don't really mean anything at all!

This morning I was reminded of a song from Cinderella. No, not because I played the wicked step-mother in 7th (or was it 8th?) grade production of the musical (most of you will not be surprised at all by that type-casting). I'm reminded of it because of the complete sense of irony it gives me. And cause the whole idea of "a dream is a wish your heart makes" scares the bejeezus out of me.

I've always had very vivid dreams. They are very detailed and in color, and I remember most of them. Sometimes remembering them is fun cuz they are so random (like the time I dreamt I  was in high school and got married on a school bus...maybe that was because the aisle so obviously went with the wedding theme...I don't really know). Sometimes they can scare the crapola out of me because of how real they seem (like the one where a vampire lived in our basement and every time a family member went down there they never came back until I was the only one left and I knew what was going to happen but I had...HAD...to go in the basement for some unknown reason - a bit cliche, I know, but it scared me silly all the same). Some are just bizarre. Weird. Head-scratchers. Kind of like stream-of-consciousness dreams. 

I know that some dream elements are supposed to "mean" something, and certain things in your dreams can represent fears or other elements in your psyche. I don't know if that is real or if its just some one wanting to find some purpose or meaning where there really isn't any. I can often find a real world connection to what I dream, maybe not the entire dream but certain elements. Like the bus dream. I was looking at old high school yearbooks that day. Obviously that took me back. I had a nightmare once as a child that I was trapped in a scary castle on Fantasy Island. Not saying for certain, but I'm preeeeeetty sure that one was because of the scary Fantasy Island episode I watched at a friends house the night before. And don't even try to tell me that show wasn't scary. Everything about that show was the perfect framework for a wiiiiiide variety of nightmares across the board!

At times, though, I don't think there is necessarily a reason for what is there. In the brain. When dreams happen. They just...happen. At least that is what I choose to believe because any other explanation would make me terrified to be alone with myself knowing what sorts of whackadoodle shit my brain produces and what it might mean about me. Head in sand. Fingers in ears. Don't want to know. Nope. Don't. Want. To. Know.

That leads me to last nights "brain performance". I can't explain it, nor will it make much sense but it was a helluva fun ride nonetheless. I leave it to you to either enjoy the ride (and be grateful it wasn't your brain creating this monstrosity) or run screaming never to return. Here we go...

I'm in my car (not my actual car, but a smaller more beat up car - like the one the lead character in Bridesmaids drives, probably cuz I just watched the movie yesterday) on the highway, following a friend because she has my cell phone either in her car or at her work or she knows where it is or something like that. Anyway, I'm following her car and I miss the exit cuz I'm trying to pass another car and can't get back into the exit lane in time  (I TOLD you this shit was detailed!) So I miss the exit and get lost. I'm driving on these really narrow streets and I find a spot and pull over and park. I get out and lock the car. At this point I realize I left my keys at home (I know, right?!? If I left my keys at home, how the hell did I get  where I was WITH my car?!? These are the parts that make me fear my brain.) So I can't get in my car and I start walking through the narrow streets where there are like outdoor market shops and street vendors. I'm looking for a bathing suit because the one a different friend of mine wanted to loan me didn't appeal to me (I know. I don't get it either. Just go with it.) I buy shorts instead and ask one of the little shop owners if I can use the phone, since I have no cell or car keys. While waiting to use the phone I decide to join some of my friends (yes, who just magically appeared) in a high school basketball tournament (yes, that is happening right there on the street), and no, I/we do not magically revert to high school age, I am my current age in the dream. This is obviously not a traditional high school basketball tournament, as there are no out of bounds and the ball is a small fist-sized lump of playdoh - not bouncy enough to dribble, but surprisingly bouncy enough to rebound (repeatedly) when I am trying to make a bank shot. I realize that under these conditions, I have no "game" to speak of. This might have something to do with the fact that I am playing with sunglasses on and a glass of wine in my hand (the wine glass in my hand is one that is actually in my cupboard - I think I was reeeeallly wanting a glass of wine last night. Not sure. Maybe.) Realizing this game isn't going anywhere, I decide to go back to my car. I pull out my keys from my purse, get in my car and go home. My cell phone never re-appears but I don't seem particularly concerned about it as I am driving away. 

There you go. This is the stuff that comes out of my brain when I'm not in control or paying strict attention. Good times. Good times. I choose to believe that I am not the only one who has such random and oddly charming dreams. They are charming. Aren't they? Aren't they?!?

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